Confession: I Didn't Cry At My Wedding-A Post dedicated to my sister Nicole

No it wasn't because I wasn't happy to be getting married, or because I was afraid I'd mess up my makeup. Both of those points can be refuted if you simply find any pictures of me dancing with my friends and husband at the reception. Man did I work up a sweat.

I just didn't flat out bawl. Not on purpose, it just never happened. (Oh, I'm sorry you all had to miss out on the ugly cry. Maybe next time.)

But, I did have 2 moments where a couple of tears came out and I got choked up.

The first time was during my vows. Everything was well and fine, and at one point when I was going through them Dave just started beaming the biggest smile.

I choked up, wiped away a few, and the rest of the ceremony was beautiful.

The second time was at the reception. I had just finished my first dance, and had a seat. Dave's best man/little brother gave his toast. It was short, sweet, and endearing.

Then it was time for the Maid of Honor's speech. My Maid of Honor was my older sister Nicole. 

Let me give you some background:

Nicole and I are almost Irish Twins. We're 14 months apart in age. Needless to say, we did everything together. We played sports together, we played pretend together, we walked to and from school together. My childhood is riddled with memories of Nicole and I together always.

The mild mannered one to my wild child. The Burt to my Ernie.

And despite the fact that I was often pushing the limits and trying to be in charge, I always wanted to be like her. At the end of the day it was tough not to compare yourself to someone who sleeps 5 feet away from you, and want to be just like that pretty, thin, athletic, and smart girl that I've followed around my whole life.

Well okay, maybe I didn't do a lot of following, but I would secretly admire her after I told her that this time I just had to be the one that played with Skipper and not Barbie.

So, when Nicole gave her speech at my wedding I knew I would love whatever it was because it was coming from her, my first best friend. It was the perfect mix of sentimental, congratulatory, and hilarious. (What story about two kids confusing the words pop and poop up in the dictionary during the middle of the night ISN'T hilarious.)

I was okay, until she looked up and told me that she just loved me so much and was so happy that we had found each other. All the while she was looking right at me, and her voice started to choke up right at the end of the speech.

You know those moments that are just so sweet that you physically have to put your hand up to your heart because it will just burst with love right that second if you don't?

That was one of them.

And at that same moment, I shed the same tears that I had for my other best friend just an hour earlier because we were promising our lives together, again for the girl who I shared my life with from the start.

So on this, the 25th anniversary of your birth, just because I am 2 hours away from you and in a different state doesn't mean I can't consider you one of my best friends and love you.

Happy Birthday Nicole.  You'll always be that composed older sister that I'll look up to forever as  perfect.

Except for that time in high school that you told me I shouldn't wear my birthstone because it made my zits really obvious and ugly. That wasn't perfect.

Okay. I guess it was good advice, I still don't own a Ruby.